Alien feet (HLD 270)

17 Dec 2020

I frequently get comments from people about my footwear while walking.

People who know things, seem to like to impart their knowledge to people who they seem to be ignorant on the subject, about the correct supportive footwear that the ignorant people should be wearing for whatever occasion.

My footwear of choice for a dog walk or a stroll undertaken without the dog, are what we in Australia call thongs. In other countries they may be referred to as flip flops, or jandles, or some other name. They are casual slip on pieces of footwear.

Obviously, to those who have a great interest in podiatry, these are not good footwear to wear for any length of walk. Or so they seem to want to tell me.

But I happen to be on very good speaking terms with my feet. I’ve been in a relationship with them for over 57 years, and over that time we have come to understand each other.

My feet are really happy with a good arch support in the footwear department. They complain bitterly when this is not so. My thongs of choice are not cheap thongs, and the reason I pay more for them than other footwear is because of the really good arch support they offer. My feet and I are very happy with this choice.

But…..if I’m going to be totally honest with you, the other reason these things are my preferred walking footwear is because I don’t enjoy wearing covered in shoes.

Because my feet need to breathe. They need a certain level of freedom.

I strongly suspect I have some alien biology in me that requires my toes to need access to air. If the entire foot is enclosed in not only socks but sturdy footwear, I can feel them silently gasping for life-giving oxygen. They start to slowly die the minute the sock goes on.

I have to look after my feet, because let’s face it they are also my primary temperature regulating device at night time, too! …….Or maybe what I assume to be a temperature regulation action of sticking one foot out from under the bed covers, is actually my feet needing oxygen also?!?!?!

Actually, now that I think of it, my eyes also have the same ‘access to air’ physiology. They really don’t like swimming goggles or masks. They cope with reading glasses because there is still air flow from the side, but enclose them totally and they are unhappy.

I accept my alien body parts and am happy with them.

Do you have alien body parts too?

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